Being a sober AA member doesn’t mean I will have a life free of trials and tribulations, but what it does give me is a Fellowship I can rely on.
There are struggles we will face in sobriety. Getting sober is not a guarantee that life will be void of trouble. On the contrary, life will have its ups and downs, life will be life. What we are guaranteed with sobriety is that we can go through it clearheaded, not clouded by drugs and alcohol. And we’re promised, as we work the Steps, “a new freedom and a new happiness.”
Shortly after receiving my three-month medallion, I learned that my oldest sister was killed by a drunk driver. I wanted to chuck that medallion into the garbage and go get drunk, but members from AA showed up at my sister’s wake in droves. I didn’t even know many of them. They wanted to express their sympathy and concern. Their love and compassion got me through that difficult time. I’ve heard in the rooms that “when life goes down, God shows up.”
Ten years later, my mother died suddenly. I was stationed overseas in Germany at the time. I got a phone call in the middle of the night from my sobbing father asking me to come home immediately. Within 72 hours I was in my father’s house, numb from the travel and the shock. I was not there long when the phone rang, and without thinking I answered it.
The voice on the other end asked for John. “This is John,” I replied. He said he was a Catholic priest. I assumed he was calling to express his condolences on my mother’s passing, but instead he said he was calling to thank me.
“Why?” I asked. He told me that he had just picked up his five-year medallion and wanted to thank me because I had taken him to his very first AA meeting five years ago. I started to sob.
He asked why I was crying, and I told him about my mother’s passing. He seamlessly transitioned from AA friend to pastoral counselor. It was another instance of God “doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.” And it was another beautiful example of “life going down, and God showing up.”
A few months ago, my wife complained of a pain in her side, so she went to the doctor for a checkup. It was kidney cancer. I was stunned. What I thought was going to be a routine procedure, suddenly turned into a life-changing circumstance. Right away I picked up the phone and called my sponsor, and within an hour he was at my house. Later another longtime AA friend showed up at the door with dinner and some things for my wife. While my wife slept, the three of us sat in the kitchen and talked for an hour. Their care and compassion sustained me.
Within a week my wife had her kidney removed. Her hospital room looked like a flower shop because of all our AA friends. After two weeks of recuperation it was time to find out the results of the biopsy. I was so scared, but I wanted to be strong for my wife. Her doctor told us that the surgery was successful, all the cancer had been removed, and no chemo or radiation therapy was needed at this time, just regular checkups. Thanks to the program and fellowship, we got through it.
Being a sober AA member doesn’t mean I will have a life free of trials and tribulations, but what it does give me is a Fellowship I can rely on. It also gives me a faith in a Higher Power that sustains and comforts me and is “doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.”