Most of our troubles stem from spiritual sickness; and this spiritual sickness is nothing more or less than being blocked off from God by some fear, resentment, guilt, or remorse caused by self-will.
Some people maintain that God punishes us when we do wrong, but He doesn’t have to punish us. When we live our lives guided by self-will, we punish ourselves. This makes self-will sound like a curse, but we were given it for a certain purpose. All through this discussion, we will be talking about “faults,” “character defects,” and a lot of other things we refer to in negative terms. We need to remember that all of them are based on instincts vitally necessary to us. These instincts are not bad in themselves, but just when they’re out of proportion or misused.
This is the case with self-will. Self-will is necessary. Our instincts keep us alive. Our instincts provide the drive which sets us apart from the lower animals and which has enabled us to make all the progress we have made.
But Bill says we are extreme examples of “self-will run riot,” and we either rid ourselves of this selfishness, or it kills us. (Big Book, p. 62)
The destruction in our world, such as war, crime, and other human violence, is the result of the will of men and women. The destructive force in just one person’s life can affect the world. For example, the Second World War resulted in the loss of millions of lives essentially because of the will of one man—Adolph Hitler. In fact, all of our human laws are written against self-will because if each person were allowed to freely satisfy his or her own will, chaos would exist. There would be no order, and thus no society. Just imagine our streets if anyone could drive on either side, at any speed, ignoring signs and stoplights, and so on!
But it seems there is no way we can overcome self-will without God’s help. This principle is very simple: if we realize that there are only two wills on earth, human will and God’s will, then self-will can only be overcome by God’s will.
Self-will cannot overcome self-will. Our great trouble is that we are trying to make ourselves better. We can’t really do that. We have to have God’s help. We have to quit playing God because it hasn’t worked.
We have to make a decision that hereafter God is going to direct our lives. At this point in the Big Book, Bill calls the willingness to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God the “keystone.” Earlier he has referred to willingness as the “foundation,” and believing as the “cornerstone.” He has been using these architectural terms, but so far we haven’t realized what we were building. Now he says this surrender of our lives and our wills is the “… keystone of the arch through which we passed to freedom.” (p. 62) Some people think turning your will and your life over to God is a trap, but it’s not. It’s an exit, a way out.