Humility is just as much the opposite of self-abasement as it is of self-exaltation. –Dag Hammarskjold In our struggles with self-hate and guilt, we may have thought we were humble – or perhaps even too humble. But self-abasement, which often alternates with feelings of superiority, is not the spiritual quality of humility that we striveContinue reading “Finding Humility As We Lose Self-Hate – Touchstones Reflection November 10th”
Category Archives: Unworthiness
The Ego And Shame; A Barrier To Humility – 12 Step Philosophy By Steve K.
In the book ‘For God’s Sake’ Alan Budge writes… “Recovery isn’t about stopping drinking (or stopping whatever). It’s about investigating the ways of the ego, and trying to change on the basis of that knowledge. It’s about surrender. For me, the whole spiritual deal is based on the idea that I’m not in charge, there is somethingContinue reading “The Ego And Shame; A Barrier To Humility – 12 Step Philosophy By Steve K.”
False Pride & Self Centered Fear – Experience The Big Book By Dr. Michael H.
Clancy I., in one of his talks, stated that false pride is a killer for alcoholics. He defined false pride as a compensation for feeling “less than”. That statement defined my life. From early childhood, I was constantly seeking approval through actions or achievements. Just being “Michael” wasn’t good enough. I never felt OK.Continue reading “False Pride & Self Centered Fear – Experience The Big Book By Dr. Michael H.”
Shame And The Meaning Of Being Human – Shame & Guilt By Ernest Kurtz
AA teaches that there is a wholeness in limitation. This understanding echoes an ancient tradition of wisdom, which saw being human as being caught in the middle, containing a contradiction. To be human, according to this tradition, means to sustain the tension of always being pulled in two opposite directions: to be more than humanContinue reading “Shame And The Meaning Of Being Human – Shame & Guilt By Ernest Kurtz”
What Is Toxic Shame – Healing The Shame That Binds You By John Bradshaw
John Bradshaw was one of the most influential writers on emotional health in the twentieth century as selected by his fellow mental health professionals. He was also an alcoholic in recovery. His areas of expertise include addiction, co-dependency , trauma, emotional instability , and abuse. This extract is the preface to the original edition ofContinue reading “What Is Toxic Shame – Healing The Shame That Binds You By John Bradshaw”
An Alcoholic and a Child of God – Grapevine Article July 1995 By Rick D.
STEP 7: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings “You ought to be ashamed of yourself.” This would have been a perfect epitaph for my headstone if my drinking had killed me before I got to AA. It was something I was constantly told; it was a feeling about myself that, although I didn’t likeContinue reading “An Alcoholic and a Child of God – Grapevine Article July 1995 By Rick D.”
Let Go Of Who You Think You’re Supposed To Be And Embrace Who You Are – Brene Brown
This article uses extracts from the first and last chapter of Brene Brown’s book ‘The Gift of Imperfection’. Her focus on worthiness is very consistent with how we move from toxic shame to healthy guilt. We’ll begin with a quote I love from Brene that I think helps put this short article in perspective. –Continue reading “Let Go Of Who You Think You’re Supposed To Be And Embrace Who You Are – Brene Brown”
Mashup – Seeking Emotional Stability Daily Reflection Aug 22nd & Being Is More Important Than Doing Aug 6th Reflection Henri Nouwen
Seeking Emotional Stability When we developed still more, we discovered the best possible source of emotional stability to be God Himself. We found that dependence upon His perfect justice, forgiveness, and love was healthy, and that it would work where nothing else would. If we really depended upon God, we couldn’t very well play GodContinue reading “Mashup – Seeking Emotional Stability Daily Reflection Aug 22nd & Being Is More Important Than Doing Aug 6th Reflection Henri Nouwen”
What Anxiety And Rigorous Honesty Have To Teach Us? 12 Essential Insights For Emotional Sobriety By Dr. Allen Berger
There are many powerful forces at work in our lives in relation to our personal development, but some of the most significant ones are the desires to be loved, to be accepted, and to feel that we belong. Take a moment to think about the importance of those desires in your current life. Can youContinue reading “What Anxiety And Rigorous Honesty Have To Teach Us? 12 Essential Insights For Emotional Sobriety By Dr. Allen Berger”
Fear Of Success – Touchstone Reflection June 28th
We fear our highest possibility (as well as our lowest one). We are generally afraid to become that which we can glimpse in our most perfect moments.—Abraham Maslow In our daily lives, we may dream of success and achievement. We strive and compete in the workplace. We go to meetings and do our part onContinue reading “Fear Of Success – Touchstone Reflection June 28th”