In the chapter , We Agnostics (page 44), the Big Book makes this very hopeful statement for many of us who have struggled to accept the dogma that we may be concerned lies ahead of us to grow spiritually in AA.
We found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek Him. To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. It is open, we believe, to all men.
Below is a link to a category called Atheism with articles that explore this broad highway. You may find some answers and reassurance that your questions have validity and are shared by many who have found a home here with us in A.A. on this Broad Highway